Having to go back to work has proven to be a challenge. I am quite anxious about my position, as my company does not have a reputation for being supportive of new moms. This stress is making my sleep schedule whacko, plus my baby is now adjusting to my new work schedule and she is not sleeping as well either. I feel like I haven’t slept in weeks. I am blessed to have a job that has flexible hours and I’m trying to stay positive. It is just difficult for me to trust anything in this environment but this is nothing new. Work stress has always been terrible, but once I get back into the swing of things I’m hoping I’ll start to feel more comfortable, maybe.
I recently read a blog with a “Currently” section and I really liked it so I am going to provide my current update below…
Loving: Being with my daughters. Ana has been on break and I’ve been able to spend more time with her over the holidays. In general just spending time with family. I love every minute with LouLou. She is changing so much every day. It is hard to believe she has more than doubled in size since we brought her home from the hospital 3 months ago.
Reading: I am reading Veganist by Kathy Freston off and on… and for fun I’m reading Reached by Ally Condie, the third in the Matched series.
Watching: I saw The Life of Pi and Les Miserables over the break… loved both. I can’t wait to see Les Mis again, even though Russell Crow is a terrible actor and singer… and I mean TERRIBLE. As far as my regular TV shows, I’m really behind. I am five episodes behind on American Horror Story and four episodes behind on Revenge… I haven’t had any time to watch TV. Taking care of LouLou is a lot of work and TV just doesn’t fit in anymore, which is probably for the best.
Listening to: Vampire Weekend and Les Miserables broadway soundtrack… a perfect pair!
Thinking about: Money (had to miss some paychecks in order to stay home so long with the bebe), work (been gone so long I worry), the nanny (she leaves in May… what to do when she leaves), sleep (really want to sleep but unable to even when I actually can)… worrying about everything as usual.
Looking forward to: The weekend (already! And it’s Monday!) so I can be with LouLou nonstop. Also looking forward to LouLou settling down into a routine so we can start to do normal things again… like seeing friends and going out to dinner once in awhile.
Making me happy: My family, my baby, my friends. I’m happy I was able to spend the first 3 months of LouLou’s life with her… uninterrupted. I’m happy every minute I spend with her as she grows and changes.